How This All Works

People often ask us what is involved in adopting a child.

Well, to give you some idea, when we received the packets of information about adoption in the mail, I consumed an entire bag of potato chips in one sitting.


The stress, oh my word!!!


Now, I am the kind of person to who is totally freaked out by anything official. The DMV makes me nervous, I despise having to get a referral to see a doctor, changing my name when I got married just about put me over the edge. I do not do "official documents" very well.


That's too bad, because the adoption process is all about precision, paperwork gathering, and getting it all done perfectly!!


To give you some idea of what adoptive families must do, I will hit the highlights.


We had three sets of documents going at the same time: the Gladney application, the Home Study, and the dossier. Now, if I were queen of the world, I would ask for the same information to be presented in the same way, but no one has coronated me queen yet. All three of these entities (agency, home study, and dossier) require essentially the same information to be submitted, but, the catch is that they all ask slightly different questions. So you can't prepare one packet for all three. 


Here's a glimpse into our lives from May-September 2009. We needed:

• a medical exam (sounds easy, but try convincing your health insurance agency to let you have another physical when you just had one three months prior)
• statement of health (must be signed by the examining doctor, in the presence of a notary whose license does not expire before 2012. God bless Sarah DiPier for being our traveling notary)
• a notarized letter from our life insurance agency verifying coverage
• original birth certificates and marriage license
• notarized letter from employers verifying employment
• notarized letter from health insurance agency verifying coverage (try calling your agency to ask for this kind of letter. I am still waiting for my letter to arrive. Marilyn said she'd send it, twice in fact, but still no letter. It's ok; our employer's verification of coverage is acceptable when the health insurance agency doesn't respond)
• state child abuse and criminal background checks (and all of these background checks, copies of birth certificates,etc. come with a fee, which requires a cashier's check, which requires a trip to the bank each time)
• a document detailing our fire escape plan
• pictures of every room of the house
• copies of tax returns
• statement about reason for wanting to adopt
• description of adoptive parents' personalities, educational level, employment history
• three visits with a caseworker, one in home
• written statements about child-rearing and discipline , and about how adoptive parents were raised
• two sets of fingerprints, one for the FBI clearance, and one for Homeland Security, which requires a trip to the Dept. of Immigration in Alexandria
• four letters of recommendation
• lots of other notarized stuff that I can't even remember
• financial assessment (this one was the worst!!!! They want a detailed accounting of all monthly expenses. Uggghhh)
• notarized letters from bank detailing account information
• 10 hours of on line adoption training

The good news is that everyone we called on for help was so incredibly nice. When I shared the reason for my call, every person was so excited to help.

Even Marilyn. Still no letter, but I am sure it's in the mail!

And looking back, assembling all of that paperwork was a superhuman feat. But was it worth it?

When I see Baby A's face, the answer is so clear! YES!